Joy Pockets

This week has just flown by.  We've been a tad busy and social.  We've done Health Visitor visits and Baby activity groups and that was just yesterday!  I find myself sitting and wondering just what happened at the beginning of the week because the rest of the week has filled my tired brain and helped me forget.  With no further ado, here are my Joy Pockets... the ones I remember anyway.

• Seeing medical professional coo over my baby
• Baby's first activity arch/play gym - a bargain and he LOVES it.  Well, as much as a 6 week old can love anything.
• Having to catch my trousers when I sneeze - they are my pre-pregnancy jeans and they are a tad big these days.
• Putting together pictures of the Cub to send to his Great-Grandma.
• Seeing my Cub in his fluffy reusable nappies.  Unfortunately, my camera has vanished so no photo evidence was possible.

Next week we have are leaving Cub with a trusted childminder so hubby and I can go to the cinema.  I'm really looking forward to going out but dreading leaving the Cub.  So, THIS is what separation anxiety feels like.

A Week of Firsts

Wow.  What a week.  I am posting this in place of my usual Joy Pockets as this week has been on of 'First' for the Cub.  There has been a lot of new experiences for us and the baby which, naturally, brings me a lot of joy.  There is a lot of focus from health professionals on milestones like sleeping through the night and how much he is eating.  I think this week has seen some important milestones - just not the medical ones.  So, here for posterity are the firsts for this week.

His first:

• Smile!  It lit up his eyes and made him look sooo adorable and cheeky.  
• Trip to his grandparents (my parents) house.  This in itself created several 'first's.
• Trip in his pushchair.  We are mostly using baby slings to get around town with but this trip we decided to use the pushchair as it is a fairly long walk to my parents house for me and I couldnt carry him that far.
• Trip out without mummy or daddy.  My parents took the baby for a walk to give us a break (I love my parents).  Sure, I spent nearly the whole time he was out thinking about him but I still got some time to be with my hubby alone for the first time since Cub was born.
• Train journey.  He slept the whole way!  He was awake when we boarded and the motion sent him right to asleep.  Now, if I only install a train in the house to send him to sleep all the time.
• Nappy in a larger size.  Cub has now busted out of Size 1 nappies.  He weighed in at 10lb 14oz on Wednesday.  We switched him into the next size up after the mother of all poo explosions.  It was truly impressive how much could come from someone so small.

Also while at his grandparents, we followed up on a family tradition - Granny bathed him is the sink!  He seemed to enjoy it.

Well mostly, anyway. 

This coming week will be some more firsts.  Some good, some not so good.  We have his first set of immunisations.  We have discussed the whole case of immunisations and will be giving him the basic immunisations, however the more controversial immunisations will be missed.  My family has a bad history will some immunisations so they will be avoided.

Also this week, I am planning on switching Cub from disposable nappies to cloth nappies.  We have them all ready, its just a case of putting the disposables down.  We are going to use up nearly all the disposables and then switch.  We have a couple of different types to use so we will see which we like the best as time goes on.  Wish us luck! :)

Er.. oops

It appears I have done something to the comments box... I think I fixed it but Im not sure.

Sorry for that.  It appears in my enthusiasm to change my template I may have slightly changed my settings.  Oh and I made a button!  I felt stupidly proud of myself.  Sad, huh?  It made my head hurt but I got there.  It only took two different tutorials and some experimentation.  But I did it!  So... grab it or exchange with me.  I am gonna try making a page of the blogs I follow.  Wish me luck. :)

Joy Pockets

This week we actually left the house!  This is amazing.  Thanks to having a large family, I am pretty good at packing a bag to take a baby out but it was still like planning a military campaign. I started planning at 8am and we left the house 5 hours later with almost everything we needed.

Anyhoo, here are my Joy Pockets for this week

Finally making headway on Cub's colic
Meeting up with friends
Inspiration hitting and being able to write again.

And finally, Cub is a whole month old today!!!

Attitude - More important than you think?

I wrote this early this morning on a pad of paper (old school, huh?).  Warning: This is a bit of a long post.  Enjoy and comment if you wanna!

The baby is finally asleep and Tigger is passed out cold from a night spent looking after a colic-y baby.  It's OMG o'clock in the morning.  I could resent that my sleep is non-existent right now or I could use that time for me.  Guess which I'm choosing.

There's something about watching the sun come up that touches my soul.  A new dawn, a new beginning - there's hope in that.  There's a chance of something to start and grow whether it's an idea, a small baby or anything else.

A lot of people have commented that I seem to be coping well with the sleepless nights.  Well, for one thing I'm the relief worker not the on-call worker normally (thanks to my lovely, wonderful hubby - and trust me, no-one is more wonderful than a 2am when they get up to the baby).  And for another, I really think it's about attitude.

I hear a lot of negativity about babies.  Throughout my pregnancy I was asked a lot of negative questions - was I sick a lot? was I too tired? was I fed up yet?  It was almost like I was supposed to suffer through pregnancy like it was an alien invasion and I should long to be back to 'normal'.  I'm not saying my pregnancy was a joy from beginning to end but neither was it endless suffering.  And no matter how I answered the questions - yes, actually I do feel crap today - I would get even more negative responses.  I swear, if I heard the phrase "If you think you are tired now..." I was gonna beat someone to death with my birth ball.

The thing was that until the last month, I maintained a positive attitude and felt pretty damn good too.  I was healthy - in fact I was healthier than I had been for a long time.  I was happy and I felt full of energy.  However, in that last month I let all the negative stuff in.  I started to agree that I was fed up with being pregnant for no other real reason than I couldn't be bothered to fight it any more.  It was easier to go with the 'you must be fed up by now' attitude than to turn around and say 'No, actually, still enjoying it thanks,'.  And you know what? In that last month, I was ill twice!  Maybe it was just a coincidence but as soon as I started spouting the negativity, I got ill.

So, what can I learn from this?  Well for a start, I love being a parent (yes, even at 2am in the morning) and while I look forward to when Cub sleeps through, I'm in no rush for it.  Yes, I'm tired but it's a good tired.  It's a productive tired.  Yes, there are days when I wonder how we will get through the next hour never mind the next day but this experience is teach me so much how can I possible see it as a negative thing.

And the things my baby is teaching me?

• Happiness is in the small details - a clean nappy; a quiet cup of tea; an old lady smiling adoringly at my baby.
• How to live in the present - I think we fall into the trap of looking ahead (when will he sleep through the night) or behind us (this was so much easier yesterday) and we lose what is happening right now (Cub held his head up on his own on Wednesday!!!).
• It is possible to do no end of things one-handed - eating, typing, dressing...
• Planning makes for greater flexibility - a properly prepared changing bag makes a big difference.
• Adaptability is key! - Before the Cub was born I had ideas about what I wanted to do as a parent including breastfeeding and not using dummies.  I have changed my mind on many things in response to Cub's needs and I actually think I am a better parent for it.  See my post When Bottle Feeding is Baby-led Parenting for more on that.

And now Cub is waking up for breakfast and the day is ready to begin.  Am I tired? Yes.  Am I happy? Yes!  I know which question is more important to my attitude.

At the River

The voices of the women hemmed her in. Senna longed to escape the sun and the slap of wet cloth of stone. Most of all, she wished she could get away from the river. The water held dangers for her. She focused on the bed linen in her numbed hands. She went through the motions of washing but her mind was elsewhere. By the bank Cora washed their father's shirts, her small delicate hands were much better at getting the dirt out of the complicated embroidery. Senna tried not to compare herself with Cora the way everyone else did. Besides, Senna always came off worse.

The sun glinted off the surface of the water and Senna froze. Seconds passed and she released the breath she held. Nothing happened. This was good.

“Stop lollygagging, girl.” Mara's sharp tones echoed over the river. The other women fell silent.

“Sorry Mara.” The apology was automatic and just as heartfelt. She bent to her task meekly in hopes of avoiding the lectures on the value of hard work. She shoved the sheets beneath the water and light flashed in her eyes, blinding her.

She blinked and saw the deep green eyes of the laughing child. She knew those eyes, they reminded her of her own. He stood on a grass bank playing. She walked towards him and smiled. He opened his hands to show her his new toy. Flames danced in his palms and he giggled. She reached down and the flames moved into her hand. She gasped, expecting pain and feeling only a ticklish warmth. She gazed as the tiny fire in wonder, turning her hand this way and that.

Her head swam and she stumbled. Tripping on the sheets in the water. Another vision. She had to get away. The boy needed her. She didn't know why but he did. Panic skittered up her spine. She had to leave. Picking up her skirts, she ran from the water. The women scattered from her path as she ran. There would be hell to pay later. If there was a later.

Bloggus Interruptus or Something like that

I wanna blog, I do!  Its just that every time I sit down to write something deep and erudite either my brain stops, I fall asleep or the baby cries.

More blogging will happen.  Soon.  I hope...

Joy Pockets

This week has been a week of getting used to a new routine and finding a balance of needs.

Here are my Joy Pockets for this week:

• A cold glass of Diet Coke
• The generosity of others
• Team work
• Ignoring housework (You can look at the dust but please don't write in it!)
• Persuading hubby (AKA Tigger) to rest during the day